Holidays

Holidays, are the days where everyone craving for all the time. It signifies the temporary end of the hectic lifestyle, providing us opportunities where we are able to perform things that we normally cannot do during the occasional working days. It is the only time where we can eventually stay to the very far from stress, tension and responsibilities. Therefore, it is said to be a necessity for us to spend them wisely, not the other way round. 

But!? To what extent is the wiseness should us perform? I still remembered vividly the previous holidays where I would face my SPM examination on the following year. It was the most horrible days where I kept them deep inside the dark corner of my heart, but there was a night which I would not forget for the rest of my life. It was as usual as the other nights, dark, silent, beautiful. I was there in front of the TV at sharp 8pm to wait for my Hong-Kong drama to be released in a minute or two. It really excited me when the opening song was heard. Out of the blue, the voice of my mum penetrated my trembling ears. She shouted at me with grim, " Shut the TV down and go to study!" I was freezed and my body refused to move. Without hesitation, I picked up the "courage" and decided to fight back. "I don't want to study! I want to watch My movie now!" I myself was surprised as I dared to be that defiant. 

The result of my offense was in vain. A red palm was there and there landing on my cheek. No words could be uttered, no compromise could be made. I was forced to bolt into my room to open up my thick reference books. History, Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Mathematics... They were all driving me insane! I was sick of the words printed on the page, I was sick of my mum who used to tell me what to do and what not to do. I did feel envious to my friends all the time. Many of them, most of them could really enjoy their holidays. Countless television hours, traveling all over the places, gathering in different restaurants and outlets... They could just do anything as long as they wished. How about me? Facing the books which may help in examinations, living in fear and stress that I had to do well in order to please my parents, to let them felt proud of their son's performance and simultaneously showing off to their friends that how great was me.

I felt so relieved after the SPM examination. It was like a lock-breaker to me, the end of my desperation. After sometime, the result was released and I got 7A3B. The result was great for everybody, including my parents. Unexpectedly, they gave credits to me. They said they were proud of having me as their son? I was confused at the moment, the result was actually moderate. Instead, it was miserable for me. I could do better than that, isn't it? Sooner or later, I applied for teacher courses through the net and as lucky as I was, my application was accepted. Later then, I started to understand and realize why was I feeling that desperate for my result. It is because of stress! I put too much stress and pushed myself to the very end that I had lost my confidence and the great attitude that I should feel satisfied for the result as long as I had tried my best.

I am now 19, in a stage to turn adulthood very soon. And glad to say that I am in my semester break currently. Well then, I am now free from the control of my mum, forcing me to study. I can do anything as I like. I can go out gathering with friends, traveling with them, watching television and serving for net for hours and days. Just name it, I am a free-bird from the cage. But, in the verge of my enjoyable moment and relaxation, something stops me. There is a storybook, covered with dust in my book shelf. I pick up the book, and cleared the dust for the very first time. I look at it, smiling to myself and know what to do next.